


Love you no matter what

by Windex_Noises



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Gen, So yeah hes uh, Trans, shocker - Freeform, trans!peter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-23
Updated: 2018-08-23
Packaged: 2019-07-01 08:05:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15769998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Windex_Noises/pseuds/Windex_Noises
Summary: Peter was horrified to tell Aunt May about the secret he'd been keeping from her...





	Love you no matter what

Peter Parker was uncomfortable with his body ever since he had to first wear a bikini in the 7th grade. 

It was no big deal, the occasion that is, just his best friends birthday party held at a nearby water-park. Aunt May and Uncle Ben agreed that he needed a new swimsuit if he was going to show up, considering his chest had definitely grown since last summer… One thing lead to another and he was in the middle of a Target dressing room holding back tears as he tried on each bathing suit. Aunt May just kept handing him more when he didn’t like the last… he had to keep  _ looking  _ at himself in that mirror, seeing those goddamn  _ things  _ that shouldn’t even be there… he knows they shouldn’t be there but despite how much he stares in the now blurring mirror. They won’t go away, they never will…

They left with a half priced bikini that Peter vowed he would wear but cover with a shirt. One of Uncle Ben’s, his are baggy on him… that should work, right?

He was wrong. Once he showed up at the place of the party a nearby lifeguard told him that the shirt was TOO baggy and potentially dangerous if he wanted to go on any of the rides that he promised Harry he’d go on.

Peter still has panic attacks about that day, remembering the stares he got, how dark everything looked, how much he cried when he got home and finally was able to lay down behind a locked door…

When it’s a week before he starts freshman year, he finally knows why he was so unhappy. Peter Benjamin Parker was born as Paige Benjamin Parker. Right mind in the wrong body, which seems to be just his luck considering the life he’s been leading. He hasn’t been able to talk to his Aunt about it since so much as been happening these last few years. Uncle Ben died… and then the Spider-Man secrets along with all those sleepless nights when he slips out at some ungodly hour to help make the streets of Queens safer… It doesn’t leave him with much freetime and, if he’s honest, he kind of hates it. He loves being Spider-Man, but he hates that he can’t talk to his only family left as much because of it..

Whenever ‘That time of the month’ rolls around, Peter always goes off radar for those cursed few days. His Aunt is always worried as hell during those times, considering Peter just locks himself in his room and barely eats, wishing he could do something to make the monthly reminder stop. Teachers have noticed that once a month his grades suffer tremendously, and even confronted him about it on several different occasions. He just came up with the best excuse he could each time.

“My cramps are very painful.”

_ “It’s hard to focus, I’ll try better next time.” _

**_“I’ve been busy with the STARK internship… I’m sorry.”_ **

Of course now he’s being  _ forced  _ to tell his Aunt about this situation he’s in, considering  she walked in on him trying so hard to bandage his chest. He can’t afford a binder, and he know Aunt May won’t have the money for it either. He’s  _ desperate.  _ Even if it’s just a cup-size down it’ll be worth it… It has to be worth it because he can’t stand the ‘Ma’ams’ and ‘Shes’ he gets every single day. 

“Paige! Oh my God, what the hell do you think you’re doing? You could break a rib!” His Aunt practically screeches. It feels like a punch to the gut, that damned name. It’s his fault she’s still calling him that though, he could’ve told her if he just wasn't so  _ scared  _ and if he was a normal fucking person-

“PAIGE! GET IT OFF OF YOU, YOUR LIPS ARE BLUE!” 

Aunt May sprints over to Peter and tears off the bandages with her bear hands, even though Peter is screaming and crying for her to stop, that he needs to do this, please just  _ let him do this. _

She manages to get them all off, now just a ball of used trash on Peters already messy room. Aunt May doesn’t look mad, she just looks worried. Her hair is a mess, a sign she just came back from work. That and the disgusting smell that always lingered in her place of work. She places a gentle hand on top of Peters, shushing him in hopes of calming him down. “What’s wrong, baby? You can tell me anything, you know that right?”

Peter begins to shake and the tears start rolling down his face before he even knows he’s crying. He tries to tell her everything in one sentence, it coming out as a garbled mess as he collapses into her arms with the only thing in the room letting him see her in his Uncles shirt being the dim moonlight filtering through the curtains. Uncle Ben always told Peter they’d love him no matter what.

The thought of his Uncle being there in the room, comforting him and making Aunt May feel so safe and secure in this unfamiliar situation… the tears only come faster.

Aunt May embraces him and rubs circles into his back, whispering to him that it’s okay, he’s allowed to cry, he doesn’t have to tell her if he doesn’t want to…

Peter looks up at her, his face red from sobbing and his voice hoarse. “But I HAVE to tell you Aunt May! I have to tell you because it hurts-” Another hit of tears hits him, feeling as if its pulling him under an ocean of doubt and regret. What if he’s just faking this all and he’s just going to burden his Aunt with something that isn't’ true? He was never diagnosed, he’s never talked to a gender therapist, Jesus does he even COUNT? What makes it REAL, what’s the sign that’s supposed to be the switch where you KNOW for sure and you don’t have to worry about lies and humiliation and the pain of it all?

His face is lifted to stare into Aunt May's copper eyes, the telltale hint of green in them as well as an entire sea of worry. 

“Tell me then. You know I’ll always love you.”

Peter’s breath slows. Something inside of him clicks when she says that. Suddenly, he’s not so scared to tell her anymore, and he even feels a little relieved. Is this the switch?

Peter will come to learn throughout the years of therapy Aunt May enrolls him into so he can get his testosterone when he’s the legal age and they can afford the costly medication that everyone has a different switch, and it can take years to find it. 

Once he started collage Spider-Man came out as a trans man. He smiled all day when he read all the posts on the internet about how  _ that  _ was the switch for some people. How  _ he  _ was the switch.

He hopes everyone finds their switch. He hopes no-one suffers the confusion longer than it’s necessary to find themselves.

One more thing he hopes is that…

He hopes his fans all know he'll love them no matter what, regardless of gender or sexuality.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked this considering its fuckinf short as hell


End file.
